I was having a conversation with a friend the other day who told me that while he was on his way to work, he wanted nothing more than to work on his own projects, one of which is a business. The thought of making a choice between his job and his own projects made him very unhappy.
I'm can relate…
My coaching practice isn't yet making money. To be fair to myself, I enjoyed my first professional coaching experience January 16th, which is only 20 days ago. That little nugget of information does little to calm the voice in my head that's telling me “push forward, FASTER FASTER FASTER”.
That's the old voice, full of ego and attempts to force some non-existent future into existence. It's the voice of “should” and “have to”. It's the voice that's gotten me into trouble before.
When thoughts like this occur I have a choice – to give them mental energy, or to let them pass by like clouds in the sky.
As I am operating in a very different way than before my choice is to let them pass by. To do that, I take a deep breath, turn on some calming meditation music, and reconnect to Source.
Reconnecting to Source (or God/Universe/however you view it) brings me calm. It assures me there is a future me I'm growing into. It assures me there is a timescale I'm not aware of, and if I simply let go of my own timescale, if I disengage my ego and thinking, and focus on the actions that are in front of me, I will continue to grow into that future self.
Reconnecting to Source allows me to feel my way through life rather than think through it. By feeling my feelings I am able to know if I am heading in the right direction. The amount of ease, happiness and joy I experience are also good indicators.
Does that mean I don't think or bring logic to bear? Absolutely not. These are important things when used at the appropriate time.
For too long though I've allowed my thinking to drive everything I do. As it's said in AA, “my best thinking got me here.” Feeling drives me toward that which is true, and thinking helps to make it happen.
I've had it backwards for so long…
But that's not surprising given our culture and everything we're surrounded by.
For me at least, when I allow my feelings to be the driver, and my thinking to take the actions, I end up much happier and more calm, and that radiates into everything I do.